I am not learning the lessons from my suffering that those in power want me to. They want me to concoct some kind of redemptive narrative out of all I suffer. I can't and I won't. Some of the lessons. Power is the most important thing. Power and empowerment are the...
I have come to think of success in the same way as the minivan thermometer. The minivan thermometer displays the indoor and outdoor temperature. Translating to success, that translates to my definition of success and society's definition of success. I am successful in...
Thirty six years ago today I begin keeping a journal. I did not keep it up my entire life, from age 9 in 1989 to age 12 in 1992. And then started my diary in April 1997 and went through 2003. Then my Xanga blog was a stand in for my diary from 2003 to 2013. Then I...
People wonder why I am not motivated by money. That one is easy, I have never had money so I don't know what having money is like. The employers I do the most for wonder why I'm not motivated by money when they haven't paid me enough to even live on my own in a modest...
Gave Claude AI the newest of my poetry and here is what they had to say: Based on the poetry you've shared, it seems you are grappling with some deep and complex emotions related to mental health, disability, faith, and society. The poems express feelings of...
i am on a fixed income of mental energyyour pep talks and crowing about suffering being redemptive and strengtheningdo nothing for me the soul is the brain's shadowthe former shrinks with the latterdespite the light shining on it i'm an etch-a-sketchshake my headand i...
divine election is like the Harlem GlobetrottersGod needs a bunch of stooge opponentsto lose and be dunked over the gospel is fresh waterto those who are being redeemedand salt waterto those who are perishing if you aren't one of the electloss of childhoodisloss of...
A Reddit comment of mine about life in your 30's. I just turned 42 and this resonates with me. People would hit 30 and they'd cut me off or ghost me because I wasn't vocationally successful. This happened for around ten years (as the first person was 30 when I was 27...
It's encouraging some people bounce back from mental illness but I'm bipolar. The results of the comparison showed that about 10% of Canadians with a history of mental illness met thriving criteria, compared to about 24% of Canadians who did not have a history of...
Don't have a visible physical disability along with the neurotic personality type (like me). A neurotic personality type is STARVED for positivity from their environment but a visible physical disability makes every interaction with the abled world an incursion. So...